Don’t Think it or Say it!

Man, we can not underestimate the power we have over our own personal lives and the lives of others! There are an abundance of things thrown at us verbally, visually even emotionally everyday. Perhaps we consider these outside influences far too much. Change that! We do consider them far too much. I want you today to consider your self  how you think about yourself how you feel about your life and where it’s going. BUT! I want you to consider it from your own point of view. Not what your friends, family or even enemies  have said over the years. It is your life you are the one living it. Live it in light of how you want it to be! 

I work in a group home now,  it saddens me to hear the way the words and opinions of others have deformed these people’s thoughts and feeling about themselves. There is power in the words other say to us. But we must not give them the last word. Sometimes people didn’t even have to say anything, their actions speak. Body language is very vocal  and can carry a lot of weight when we are vulnerable, and we can not be strong all the time. Ultimately we have to decide who are we living for. More often than not we tend to hold on to the words spoken to us. Everyone wants to be loved and accepted. But if the people you have in your life are keeping you down then tell them so! Most importantly don’t believe it. We are all beautiful. We are all necessary and needed. God created each and every person here. He created us out of love regardless of how your life seems. You are important to Him and your happiness is important to Him. Greatest of all there is a reason for your being here and it has nothing to do with being depressed, defeated or disregarded.

Remember hurting people hurt people. We are all broken in someway and we may be the ones doing the hurting. We hurt ourselves by thinking down about ourselves. Now here is where we could wind up finger-pointing and that helps no one it just makes excuses and keeps us from solutions. We learn things and we can unlearn things. Remember how we talked about habits? Our thought process and reactions are out of habit. We make habitual responses to regularly occurring situations. Perhaps if we modified our responses then we would break the cycle.

Every thing aside you must think speak and respond to life in away the brings joy and peace. If you are hoping and praying for bigger and better things in life you will never enjoy them as long as there is hurt in your life. I’m not saying success won’t come but I’m saying unless you have compassion for yourself and those in your life you will never truly be happy.

We can all crawl out of the darkness. But it needs to start with good thoughts kind thoughts loving thoughts about our selves. We can not love others if we do not first love ourselves. That can also be said about most things caring, kindness, generosity, compassion on and on. But I digress I think you get it. You are a great person tell your self that and perhaps let some one else know you think they are great too.

God bless! Enjoy!

The Midst of Change

So we have begun and we are doing well on our journey of personal improvement. Each of us has chosen something  to work on. Even if it is the same as someone else remember ” your path will be yours”. We are all different and as unique individuals we must not carbon copy someone elses process. So in the midst we are doing great! Now we can fall into one of two traps. First we can say “I’m doing good following the plan I set its been a few weeks and I think I should reward myself.” NO! This is a temptation and we must not yield to it. It is so easy to relapse and we can tell ourselves little lies that will lead to our own destruction. A little dramatic I know. But the damage it can do to you mentally must not be underestimated. I will use two examples;  Dieting you’ve been eating properly following your plan drinking lots of water exercising even. Now you give in to the temptation or “treat yourself” as you choose to call it.   Second example; you have been very good with your budget but there is a good sale. Since you’ve been so good you deserve it and you will look so good in it too! Lies Lies Lies! You may look good in it BUT the effect it will have on your attempt to gain control will be deep and hard. It has only been a few weeks and you are giving into the desires of the flesh or the eye. Either one it is trying to control you. DO NOT YIELD TO TEMPTATION!!!

The second lie we tell ourselves is ” that’s good enough.”  I will not dwell on that one because all that can be said is, ” you are settling.”  Take it from some one who has settled far too much in life. Settling never makes anyone happy or satisfied! Don’t settle for good enough!

You are trying to change some deeply engrained habit. It takes time and commitment. Think how you will feel say 10 minutes after you eat those chips or buy that top. Perhaps defeated is a good word. Change is hard enough without us sabotaging our selves, stay strong make the commitment stick. Resistance is NOT futile. I have heard many numbers of days, weeks or months are necessary before something becomes a habit or one is broken. Personally I feel the stronger the hold something has the long it takes to battle against it. For myself I think a vice is a vice and we may have to battle it all our lives so we must always be on guard against it. Awareness is key to personal happiness. It is so easy to slip back into old habits. Be on guard, you are doing great, stay on the road to personal freedom!  The change will affect every part of your body and life. You will be flooded with confidence and courage! I will add the most important thing to remember, God is for you! Pray for strength to over come!

Procrastination the Dream Killer!

What is procrastination? The action or habit of putting things off. You see that, habit! I think it is the worst habit to have because the desire to change something, anything about ourselves can be with in us but we are in the habit of putting it off. The lies we tell ourselves stem from procrastination. Oh I’ll start tomorrow. Theres no rush. It is just not the right time. It can even affect the advice we give our friends. You don’t need to rush into that. Take your time it will be there tomorrow. Well there is that party this weekend, start on Monday. Call it what you like it is PROCRASTINATION! Ugly but true. It is not until farther down lifes road that we see the toll it has taken. I call it the Great Canadian Illness. We all do it to some degree. Small doses not so bad but like all habit they grow when fed. I am not a fan of generalizing so if I have offended I’m sorry. Putting things off is bad for our health bad for our own personal development, bad for our careers, bad bad bad. What am I saying? It’s bad! This is a habit of the mind but it affects the emotions the soul the health of each individual. Addressing it is a huge challenge. You can see the damage it does when you reflect. Reflection is huge when it comes to giving clarity and direction. I am not trying to discourage anyone but as you reflect it may be quite possible that you will be sent for a loop when you see the extent to which you have become A PROCRASTINATOR! EEK it’s a label but a label that can be removed with a bit of determination and planning. How will we overcome this life sucking habit? The same way we over come any habit that is keeping use from our full potential. We must consider what life will be like if we chose to continue as we are. If we decide to change we must create a plan of action. Each persons plan must fit the individual life, remember we all live different lives. What works for one does not work for all.  A habit is something we acquire by frequent repetition a settled pattern. We need to change the pattern of our behaviour. Yes this is work but when we work on ourselves to improve ourselves we make our life better. Lets face it don’t we all want a better life. I know I do. I truly dislike going around the same issue over and over having only temporary victory never really free. The key is to get to the point where enough is enough. I want permanent change this comes by creating new a new habit. Procrastination is the act of not doing or putting it off for a long time so we must make the opposite our new habit. See what needs to be done and do it! Don’t hold yourself back the power to change is inside each of us. Remember only you can change you! Ah but to the right measure okay because we can go too far in the opposite direction.  But we won’t focus on that yet! All the best on you personal transformation journey!!

Fresh Start Yippy!!!

How corny is that, every day is a fresh start. A redo or do over or a dump it and start again. Regardless it is only a fresh start if you chose to make it that. Each year most people, not all, start out with New Years Resolutions. A resolve to change I have made and failed more resolutions then I care to think of. But, ah the beautiful but. Had I not at least tried I would never be where I am now. Now does that mean that I am satisfied where I’m at? No but it does mean that I am better off then I would be had I not at least attempted to change. Remember change is a process, and life is a journey. Where you are today is not where you will be at the end of your time here. At least you should be hoping that you will not be in the same boat you are in now. Good or bad you do not want to stay at the same level. Experience is a great teacher and the only way to gain experience is to continually develop try new things learn new things. Hopes and dreams are not just fantasy,  they can be achieved, but only when we chose to believe in yourselves. Also to believe that there is a reason for everything. Your character is being shaped by how you respond to what life brings your way.  All life experiences can be used not only for your own good but for the good of those around you. Live outside yourself. Chose to bless those in your life by caring about them. Now to be able to care for others we MUST care for ourselves. How we feel about ourselves and the life we are living speaks volumes about how we treat others. Hurt people will always hurt people. The hurts of our past must be dealt with we must let them go. Only then will we be able to move forward.

It’s not about the does and don’ts!

Isn’t it? Don’t we turn everything in to a list of the things we can do and the things we can’t. I believe it is counter productive. We should be living into the victory we are wanting to see NOT living into the check list. I also believe that as individuals we will each find our own path to success. Remember we are unique and should not be followers. Except when it comes to Christ He was and is the only example, and He never went around with a list. He lived it He walked it out He made it happen and that is what He does for us. He helps us live it out.

Now lets say you are not a Christian but you still know about commonsense. So much of what Jesus taught and did was common sence when it comes to living a happy full life. Sorry happy and full do not come from wealth so the pursuit of wealth is in it self living for money. I just deleted my ramble, remember it is not about does and don’t. Lets go to dieting no one should need a list you were born with common sense , USE IT! All packaging has everything you need to know about what you are putting into your body. If you do not exercise you are not burning enough calories plus you probably are achy and sore. Get moving to pump that blood through your entire body. If you are broke all the time stop spending more than you are making. If you are not happy figure our why.

It is okay to rely on yourself. Who knows you better than You? No body! You know what you like and what you don’t like. Those are the only two does and don’t to consider. Notice I did not put worry. Worry solves nothing in fact it is a great defeater of those who are trying to change. So my advice for you today is, pitch the list of does and don’ts and rely on your own common sense to help you change.

This does not mean you never seek wise counsel. It does however mean that you use that beautiful brain you have been given to create the life God has for YOU! Yes God is the wise counsel you should seek. Seek it though His word not by the actions or opinions of others. Go to the source!

Now after saying all that I am not in any way suggesting we cut ourselves of from others and their opinions. We can learn so much from those who struggle with the same issues we have, and we can learn from them too. The problem comes when we think we need to copy what they did and how they did it.  We are all individuals and we will each find our own way to wellness that suits our life and our way of living. Start where you are and grow from there. It is a process a life long process it requires patience and kindness towards yourself. Blessings to all who are on the road to perfection or as close as we can get here.